Monday, June 27, 2011

Processing







Sometimes I catch myself wondering how I should phrase my Facebook status for the day. I eat something delicious or William does something funny and I try and word smith the status in my head even before I get to the keyboard. Or, I start pondering my blog post as I'm on my morning walk. It's satisfying. And strange at the same time. Four years ago I didn't have a Facebook page. I didn't have a blog. I didn't have an internet presence. And I was fine with that. I knew that when I started this blog post that I didn't want to express a strong opinion one way or the other on the subject of our internet footprint. I did, however, want to talk about the weird way we're learning how to process information and articulate our life happenings on the web. I used to journal frequently--scribbling my thoughts down in books of all shapes and sizes. And I still do to a degree, but there's a certain amount of transparency that I enjoy when I actually hit the "publish post" button and realize that my thoughts have been crystallized thanks to my blog space. Or when I bake something yummy I feel like I'm wafting the chocolaty deliciousness out my door an into your home. I'm sharing. In a way. We process things differently. I have a sister who needs to talk--needs to get her quota of words out per day. That's how she finds connection. I also have a friend who processes quietly, meekly, by herself and shares specific information with a select few trusted souls. We each have our way of making sense of our days and the world around us. I've been surprised at how my needs have changed over the year with William but also as I've grown more attached to things like texting, Facebook, and longer, rambling posts here on my blog (although infrequent). Being a stay-at-home mom has definitely changed the way I view my need to connect--I crave it like none other. I need to be seen and I need people to hear me--even if that means sitting in a playground chatting with a stranger about the benefits of sippy cups. I also have noticed that I need different ways of processing--mostly due to the lack of personal time. I don't have the time or space to sit down and write for hours in my journal. I have laundry to do, orders to fill, supper to cook and places to be. I feel like it takes me a little longer to discover new parts of myself or to actualize lessons I'm learning this way. Is it because our thoughts are fragmented to the basic of basic text messages? Or the brief statuses we write on our walls? I wonder... I really have no idea. It's just interesting! So, no real conclusions in the end... just a bit rambly.

Sending love,
Jewels

PS The hydrangeas are in full bloom here--lots and lots of blue!

3 comments:

Krissy | Paper Schmaper said...

hi mama,
boy do I love those blue hydrangeas... they were my wedding flowers! i hope your sister starts a blog. I would read it daily. you've inspired me to possibly post a little "blip" on my space.
hope all is well with you!

Cindy said...

i'm kind of a thinker, especially if things are upsetting me. i circle the wagons, which is not good i know. when i feel a bit better about the situation (processed it) then i'll talk about it. i guess i don't want people to feel sorry for me. i wish i was more open like you. i think it would make things easier.

i does seem like we're busy with so many more things these days - blogs, facebook, flickr, twitter, but i'm not sure where it's all going? it seems surface-oriented when it comes to relationship-building, and yet, when i actually get together with someone i've met online (like you) we know so much about each other. in some cases, my online friends know more about what i'm doing than my own family.

things are changing. people seem to be on twitter a lot and not blogging as much, which has more substance, although i do love twitter from time to time.

oh well, now i ramble and my word verification is

pyroozoo

funny.

Callie Grayson said...

:)
I had to smile, You call yourself a "Stay at home mom"
If I were to describe you, I would say "You are a work at home mom, creating beautiful books all the while enjoying the moments of you sons life,.... While working from home"
oh, and don't forget the laundry. to me that's work. :)

I love having a blog, I am typically a talker. But as I get older, I am enjoying quiet and just writing. It has become a passion to be kind of anonymous and write what i feel and think for whoever wants to read what I do!

xx
callie