Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Ever feel that fitful, vulnerable, strangely enigmatic feeling that comes in the morning, when it's too early to be morning and too late to be night? Sometimes I feel it when the sun starts drifting in the afternoon sky--light wanes and shadows deepen. It's like feeling a door close behind you, or being caught out in the cold. I'm not sad. Not happy either. Something feels "off." I try and describe it here because it helps in explaining to Andrew later on in the day that, no, it's not you hun. It really is me. It's feeling alone, even in the face of new and beautiful friends. It's feeling incompetent when nothing is going wrong. Sensitive... just sensitive, maybe? I'm not sure. I do know, however, that recognizing this... whatever it is, is the first step. Next is tea. Because there's nothing more soothing to me that a steaming mug of tea. Lots of milk. And writing. Today is a rambling writing day, sorry. I just thought that maybe you've felt this too...
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