I've been working at our other work location these past few days, which, I'm afraid, is not conducive to blogging. And I've missed you guys! Holy wow, is anyone else as addicted as I am? Just a little nibble from Marie Claire Maison. I love all the different delicious rooms, trends, food and design they display on this site. Thought you might too :)
Okay, I have a question for you. Kind of a tough question, and a personal one at that, but a question that is pretty important to me right now.
How do you deal with disappointment in yourself?
I realize that there's a great deal that that question could cover (work, love, art, family) and I welcome any and all insight, whether personal stories or just sage wisdom you've collected along the way. But, I feel like I'm in a "thought rut" that's crippling and bouncing it off you guys probably would help! I'm personally going through the process of discovering the right combination of "Try, try again" and "this is a handicap I have to deal with" in the work arena. And of course, when it comes to certain things that are important to you, you rarely remember all the successes, you just remember the things you did "wrong!" So, like I said, any and all thoughts, observations, stories, or wisdom would be so, so helpful right now!
17 comments:
drooling over here. what are those crispy pancake looking things?? i think i can smell them.
and to answer your question: move on to the next moment.
Glad you are out there. I missed you! More on your question later (because I have no easy or succinct answer!).
yay! you're back :) Lovely photos! I was beginning to think my pen pal went away...
I think I dwell for a few moments, then take a break and try again. I like Jessie's advice. It's pretty hard to do, I know. Hope everything is ok!
i love those photos, so lush.
when i feel deep disappointment or sadness i try to accept those feelings for a little while. i find that if i try to get over them quickly, i can't and it adds to the stress. the simple release often makes me feel so much better.
sometimes, things aren't always rosy, but it's often temporary and will work out over time. hope that helps.
xo, cindy
missed you girlie...lovely images too!
This is a tough one, but one I have struggled with a lot. I used to let my disappointment in myself consume me, then Mr. French came through. He has really helped me to move on and not dwell on past failures. Even if it happened 30 seconds ago, it is the past. This little quote is staring at me right now:
"The best way to predict the future is to create it."
ease up on sweet, talented you!
Those crispy pancake things do look good. I like what Mrs. French said - amazing quote. I deal with disappointment in myself - more often now than ever since I don't like my current job. I keep thinking there is more to life and I'll get through it. Like you literally have to snap yourself out of it and think of all the good you have and will do. Good luck...hang in there.
I deal with it everyday, if you can imagine! Sometime i literally think i am nuts...The advice given already is amazing...take it as it comes and look at the positive side of things. If we don't suffer a bit we don't get to appreciate the amazing things in life...like what's loving and beautiful around us...what makes us smile.
I keep telling myself this: enjoy the moment, smile and laugh more play with the little guy when he asks me too...There you go, just the right doze of uplifting...
I am not the right person to answer this, as I always dwell over right and wrongs. Taking pride in the things you do well is a first step and then maybe analyze who's wrong you are worried about. Many times we are more concerned about what we think others may perceive as wrong or bad, rather than look into your own heart...
lovely pics!
hmm, dealing with disappointment is tough. some thoughts: make a list of your successes (no matter how small) and also treat yourself especially gently! a hot bubble bath with a good book can do wonders to heal those feelings of disappointment. if those feelings are lingering too long, i try and breathe and get present. laughter is always good too! xoxox
hm. i grew up in a household where at times, people very very critical of me, particularly of my work, especially since i come from people who are veterans of the design biz. i've also often been told that i wasn't good enough. and so growing up, i was "immune" or used to criticism. thankfully i'm not one to dwell on things, and i'm really stubborn :P i tend to view disappointment, or, if my performance doesn't allow me to meet my set goals, as a learning experience.
Wonderful images --- so great.
I go through disappointment with work stuff all of the time (not exactly in the 'career' that I thought I'd be right now)...I don't have much advice, but just know that we've all been there...and will be there again...and again. I think little steps and/or small changes sometimes work to get us through those bumps...
Disappointment has been my best friend over the past several years, or a best friend that is not so friendly I should say. I usually talk to my hubby about it and if that doesn’t work I talk about it with someone else who knows me really well. When disappointment is really weighing me down, I let the disappointment consume me for a few hours or a day, and then I allow myself to feel sort of angry about it which generally results in reminding me of what I am capable of and what I deserve and pushing forward with greater drive to make it better if even for a brief moment.
Hmmmn..well there is this quote (my absolute favorite quote) that reminds me how to "deal" with disappointment and such.
Omar Khayyam said..."be happy for this moment, this moment is your life..."
OK, I know it's a simple and blunt quote but for me it pulls me back into the "present" and makes me realize that YES...this *moment* in time is *MY* life and everything I was letting consume me like disappointment and sadness...pity...whatever it may be or for whatever reason is "no big deal" and is most likely small compared to the grand scheme of things. It helps me relax and live in the moment. So, I'm not sure if this will help in your situation but I hope it does.
P.S....I have this beautiful bracelet with a ceramic pendant (handmade by an Esty artist) that says "this moment is your life"...just so I can glance at it and remember to "take in" every last one of these moments I'm so grateful for.
I meant to respond earlier and the day got away from me. I have no advice to offer as I am in a spot right now where I am dissapointed in myself quite often. It was so nice to see others advice! I just wanted to say I love coming here and seeing what you have to say everyday - it is truly wonderful.
How do I deal with disappointment? Mild depression and diversion, I think. Favorite diversions being sweets (gelato, chocolate, mochi balls, madeleines), entertainment (movies, TV, Internet), naps, books, living room karaoke.
Repeat until disappointment dissipates or dissolves.
hmmm...you know, whenever I design a new collection I have days where I'm upset with myself for any number of things: wished i spent more time perfecting this and that and oh if I put more effort into it i could have come up with something better and if I had funding I could add these elements or if i hadn't procrastinated I could have...etc et al...
i used to fret and beat myself up but these days I've tried to breathe it through and push that little guy out of my head. I kind of tell him to SHUT UP, take a deep breath and take notes for what I can change on my next try around--usually i wake up with a new perspective, I get some feedback and push on with what I can do--it's part of a process a lot of creative people go through I think.
(my friend once showed me this: she held up the back of her hand and made a sad face and said, "see? this side: negative." then she turned it around to show me the palm and nodding her head, smiled and said, "this side...POSITIVE!" sometimes i think about that and it gives me just the right perspective to carry on...)
jewels! i've missed you!
although it's a little bit after the fact, i wanted to throw my two cents in.
there's a song by chantal kreviazuk that i love called 'weight of the world' that makes me so upbeat and happy all the time, and it's lyrics are so poignant and true..
"and there's always something
somebody right behind
but we're not meant to be everything
we're just a piece
so spread your wings"
if you haven't heard it (i can't remember if it was released as a single or not), then i'd highly recommend checking it out. i find it incredibly helpful so that when i go all perfectionist and competitive, it reminds me to just relax and move on... cause you can't do everything and be everything to everyone all of the time.
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